


Alea iacta est

by Crowleysheiress



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Gen, Hux doesn't know he has a crush, Hux has a crush, Idiots in Love, Love/Hate, M/M, Mutual Pining, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Wingman Phasma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-08-10 18:35:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7856536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crowleysheiress/pseuds/Crowleysheiress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>General Hux is at his wit's end and it's all Kylo Ren's fault.</p><p>Or</p><p>Hux needs a way to stop Kylo Ren from destroying his ship and his nerves and Phasma offers the perfect solution.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Alea iacta est

**Author's Note:**

> My second TFA fic. It was heavily inspired by a comic on tumblr, which I unfortunately couldn't find anymore when I posted this.  
> English is not my first language, so if you find any grammer or vocab errors it would be nice if you cold point them out to me.

Alea iacta est

General Hux was at his wit’s end.

Him being out of options was an unusual and, frankly, rather worrying matter. His education at the Imperial Academy had provided him with solutions to most problems he might encounter in his career, after all.

Technical malfunctions? The Resistance attacking? Brawls between the troops? Drunk officers? All just minor incidents, which could be quickly managed and overcome. Were they annoying and bothersome when they happened? Of course, but did they give him any trouble sleeping? Definitely not.

Since he had been promoted to General he had been sure that nothing would ever make him fret again. He had been absolutely confident.

And then came Ren.

Ren was the complete opposite from anything Hux had ever known. He was loud and irascible, cocksure of himself and every kind of criticism seemed to just bounce right off him. Whoever decided to get smart or mouthy with him could brace himself for a visit at the paramedic’s and multiple walls and commando consoles had been destroyed in his wrath.

Hux simply had no idea what he should do anymore. The Academy had given him no solutions for Kylo Ren. So he had tried anything that had seemed halfway reasonable to him.

He had ignored Ren and hoped he would just _stop_ after a while.

He had sent underlings to Ren to inform him that his behavior would no longer be tolerated and that otherwise there would be grave consequences.

When that didn’t help he had gone to Ren himself. And for the the first time since his schooldays he had felt like he was being laughed at. At first Ren had simply ignored him and then he had been unceremoniously asked if he wasn’t needed somewhere else.

Goddamned Ren. Goddamned, disrespectful Ren. Hux would _not_ put up with that!

He had thought about going to the Surpreme Leader to complain about his little pupil, but after some careful consideration he had decided against it. Not only because he felt like this was something that Ren would do and thus it was logically out of option for _him._ No, denouncing Ren would certainly make Snoke anything but happy and losing his favor would neither be good for him, nor for his career.

Goddamned Ren. Goddamned Ren and his goddamn inviolability.

„Phasma“ Hux sighed and observed the captain, who was sitting opposite him. „What am I supposed to do, Phasma?“

Usually, he would never talk about his personal problems with a subordinate, but he and Phasma had been regulary meeting for drinks since he had been a Captain himself, and she had never shared anything that he had told her in a tipsy state. Besides, he would _never_ let himself drink enough to share anything too private or important with an underling, no matter how good their relationship was.

„I just have no idea what else to do!“ he continued. „ He doesn’t seem to care about the damage to property he causes! Or how everyone who talks to him ends up slightly traumatised! Does he even know how much all of that costs?!“

„No“

„Exactly! And he’s not even remotely interested in it.“ Hux said and took a sip from his drink. _Calm down Hux,_ he told himself. _You’re getting too agitated. Like Ren._

„I can’t go to Snoke. And he either ignores me or doesn’t take me seriously. There has to be some way to stop him.“ He said, quieter this time.

„Are you scared of him?“ Phasma asked and gently twirled the amber liquid in her glass.

„God, no! He is exhausting and annoying, but I’m certainly not scared of him.“ Hux said indignantly.

„That’s good. That gives you an advantage over about 90 % of the rest of the crew.

„Huh. How?“

„Wait for it. Is he scared of you?“

„No“ Hux sighed and and gulped down the rest of his drink. „ That would make my life considerably easier. He doesn’t even respect me. He does not care that I’m above him in the rank hierachy.“

„Officially, you are co-commanders.“

„Officially“ he repeated. „Officially yes, but practically he doesn’t do anything, but annoy his surroundings.“

„You know, Hux, I’m surprised that the solution didn’t come to you yourself.“ Said Phasma and ran a hand through her short, blond hair.

„What solution?“ he asked warily.

„Become friends with him.“

„Excuse me?“ Hux asked, shocked, and tightly gripped his glass.

„People tend to listen more to their friends than to their superiors or coworker, because of the emotional connection. Criticism hits them harder and they often try to change, simply to make their friends happy. Most of the time they don’t even consider the option of sacrificing their important friendship to continue their problematic behavior. Hux“ she said and leaned forward. „ If you befriend Kylo Ren the advantages will outweigh the disadvantages.“

„But I don’t like him! He is horrible!“ Hux hissed in order to keep his voice down and let go of his glass to cross his arms instead. „How should I befriend someone whom I hate?“

„When we met I didn’t like you either.“ Phasma said, stone-cold. „ Far too uptight. Far too much theoretical knowledge. And the self-loathing _and_ superiority complex were a bit deterrent. But wonders never cease. Besides“ she interrupted herself and waved at the bardroid to come over. „ Hating him is alright, atleast you feel _something_ for him. Just imagine trying to spend time with someone you’re completely indifferent about, no interest whatsoever.“

„Ren does _not_ interest me.“ Hux said and decided to ignore her comments about him.

„And yet you spent the entire evening talking about him. And you always stare at him in the corridors, with an expression as if somebody shaved your cat.“

In stunned silence Hux let his glass be filled by the bardroid and tried to properly stomach what Phasma had told him.

He had to befriend Ren. _Kylo,_ he had to make friends with _Kylo._

„Well, there is the other option of course.“ Phasma said and sipped at her drink. „Sex is another way to quickly ensure an emotional bond with someone. And according to my information it can work even better than friendship. But in my opinion you should just befriend him.“ She added. „I’m definitely not Kylo Ren’s biggest fan, but the way he just stands around on his own the whole day, you could almost pity him. A friend would be good for him. And for the interior equipment. And for you! Ren is not the only one who might need someone to socialize with, General. Or atleast someone in their own rank.“

Hux would have sent anyone else to reconditioning for such a statement. For Phasma he let it slide. This time, at least.

Absentmindedly he took a sip and stared at a dent in the metal surface of the bar.

He knew that Phasma was right, of course. Her argumentation was flawless and he understood her logic, but he simply struggled to accept her conclusion.

He didn’t like Ren. But he also wasn’t completely indifferent about him.

Ren was irascible, immature and unlikeable. But he also was the best single fighter of the First Order. When there was a battle, that they absolutely had to win, he had no doubts about sending Ren, so he seemed to have at least _some_ skills.

Ren didn’t like _him._ Well, he didn’t knew that for sure, but he definitely acted that way.

Now that Hux thought about it he realised that he was the only person, except Snoke, whom Ren talked to. Real, actual talking and not just spiteful or disrespecting comments or throwing someone against a wall or choking them with that `force´.

If he could believe Phasma, Ren was lonely. If he could believe Phasma, he was lonely as well. Maybe they _could_ be friends.

No! No, no, no. His thoughts were wandering in a direction they definitely weren’t supposed to go.

„I’m going to have sex with Kylo Ren.“ He announced quietly and drowned his glass in one big gulp.

„You don’t _have_ to, you know?“

„No, I’m going to“

Hux rose to his feet and Phasma stood up with him.

„Your assistance concerning this matter has been greatly appreciated, Captain. Have a pleasant evening.“ He said formally.

„Of course, General“ Phasma said and saluted him swiftly.

Hux pulled his greatcoat, which had been hanging over the backrest of his stool, over his shoulders and began crossing the room at a quick pace. Wherever he passed, the laughter and quiet talking ceased for a moment.

Phasma sighed and sat down on her barstool again.

For such a smart man Hux really was an unbelievable idiot.

He probably wouldn’t recognize feelings if they jumped straight at his face. Or he just didn’t like to admit that he was in love.

In the end it wouldn’t matter. He and Ren just would have to get over themselves.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it. Comments and/or kudos would be greatly appreciated :)


End file.
